Horrible Bosses: Entitled by Title
Be More Than the Role. It’s Only a Show.
On the set of the 2012 movie Lincoln by Steven Spielberg, the cast and crew, including Spielberg himself, referred to Daniel Day-Lewis as “Mr. President” on set while filming. It was deliberate to help him stay in character - which Daniel Day-Lewis managed to do admirably well.
Some actors can switch back to their real selves after shooting a scene; others need more to make their acting authentic.
Just like movies are full of characters, corporate life is full of roles and job titles. Somehow, it must help to put people in boxes so they can be neatly arranged on an organizational chart, with lines and arrows showing who can do what - with and to whom.
Cross over one line, or try to escape your box, and you’ll be stepping on someone else’s toes, ruffling feathers, making insecure people feel even more insecure… troublemaker!
So, after a few attempts, once you’ve been put back in your place a few times, you become that box, with that label underneath. And you might not dare to change - until you decide to leave the box and get into a new one.
Your self-importance becomes a function of how many boxes sit below yours - and how many are above you. How many layers between your box and the CEO’s up there?
Your status is dictated by the label under your box: Associate / Managing / Executive / Area / Group / Global / Deputy Director… or Junior / Associate / Managing / Senior Partner… or Assistant / Associate / Vice / Executive President… or Chief Happiness / Evangelist / Experience / Success Officer…
So many options to manage one’s ego and reward every step of the climb to the top of the ruthless corporate ladder!
Below are three stories. Three episodes that got me thinking about what leadership truly is, and why - when people rise to the top - they seem to revert to schoolyard archetypes:
The alpha (ringmaster), the schemer (manipulator), the enforcer (bully)…
And raise a few questions:
Do we just regress when we get older? Or just never grow up?
Does our experience make us overconfident in our beliefs?
When do our job titles become our new reality?
It’s good because I say so
Washington, US, circa 2006. I’m attending a company event and bump into a Senior Partner at the buffet. Apparently, the CEO is in town too. I must have made a comment about the buffet food… I forget exactly, but I remember clearly what the Senior Partner said:
“If it’s good for the CEO, it’s good for you.”
I stayed silent and smiled politely… letting it sink in.
Then I realized—hell no! Even CEOs can have poor taste, right? Does their title make them right all the time? Untouchable? God-like? What’s up with this nonsense? A bad sandwich is still a bad sandwich!
To be clear, if a CEO likes junk food, that doesn’t make them a bad (or good) CEO.
It was just the comment that felt awkward - like your job title suddenly gives you the right to declare universal truths, to assert what’s good or bad, right or wrong - even about things completely outside your scope… like the food I eat (!).
I yell because I can
Toronto, Canada, circa 2010. Monday morning. I’m seated in my cubicle at the client’s site. Although I’m quite far from the main boardroom where the Monday Grand Mass (a.k.a. client leadership meeting) is happening between my bosses and theirs, I hear yelling. Loud, angry, intense yelling.
A few minutes later, I see my boss passing by and ask, “How did it go?”
He shrugs. “The usual. We got scolded and yelled at. All good.”
I started wondering… Really? That’s just… okay? Because he’s the client? The CEO? Because he pays our bills? Does that give him the right to bully everyone?
I was young and naive, but that got under my skin.
I imagined what I’d do if I were yelled at like that.
Three options:
Stay quiet and wait it out, which feels like endorsing the behavior.
Yell back—not ideal for your job or the business (I tried!)
Calmly say you’ll continue the conversation when it can be more constructive, and walk out, but might be seen as undermining authority.
To this day, I still prefer 3), but none are great. All come with risks.
Here’s the issue: people in power are rarely challenged. The best leaders seek opposing views. Most don’t. They prefer echo chambers.
The more you’re yelled at, the less you speak up. The less the boss knows, the worse their decisions get. Toxicity spreads. Culture turns bad.
Like a toddler’s tantrum, if no one stops it, it becomes the norm. And when the boss yells, the yelling trickles down. Contagious!
And it’s not just the yelling, Jeff Bezos often says that in every meeting he attends, he speaks last. Why? Because when you are in a position of power, you can intentionally influence your collaborators. By speaking last, you let them express themselves freely before you chip in.
Role play happens beyond the boardroom, of course. Wherever power plays… like in politics. I remember the following episode quite vividly.
You are fired because I am the boss
Paris, France, July 19, 2017. General Pierre De Villiers resigns as Chief of Staff of the French Armed Forces.
In a closed parliamentary hearing, he had voiced concern over budget cuts affecting France’s defense capabilities. The comments are leaked. President Macron, newly elected, publicly humiliates him in front of 2,500 guests at the Élysée Garden Party. The General resigns in protest - a first under France’s Fifth Republic.
Macron says:
“If something sets the Chief of Staff of the Armed Forces against the President of the Republic, the Chief of Staff changes.”
This is the “little manager complex”: people who wield job titles like weapons to command authority. It’s not leadership—it’s insecurity.
People begin believing in their own importance based solely on their job title or the company logo on their card.
Conclusion
When I was running my startup, I met many semi-retired executives in Southeast Asia. They had held big titles at big companies - and now wanted to partner, make introductions, or consult.
But their connections no longer cared. Why?
Those contacts valued them only when they held power.
The relationships were transactional, not authentic.
They quickly lost industry relevance.
Having worked as an independent consultant, I’ve felt the difference. No brand behind you. No support team. Every deal must be earned.
What I’ve learned:
Build your network when you don’t need it.
Focus on quality, authentic relationships.
Listen, stay humble, keep learning.
Earn respect by being genuine and generous.
Lead by sharing and lifting others up.
Final words
I started KoncentriK with this question:
So what if instead of lines and trees, organizations and relationships were defined as circles and spirals instead? What if authority and power were shared across evenly around the table so "everyone who sat around it was seen as trustworthy and equal" (Knights of the Round Table).
To the questions above, I don’t have all the answers. But I believe:
Respect is earned.
Leadership is influence.
Listening is a superpower.
Authority is the last resort.
Hierarchies make us forget we are equally human.
Boxes are meant to be broken open. Lines to be crossed.
Job titles are just roles we play in the great corporate show. So play your part well. Help create a collective masterpiece.
But after work, once the lights are off and the stage is cleared. Revert to your true self. No “Mr President”. Be the friend, father, wife, partner, or daughter that others need.
And importantly: don’t take yourself too seriously.
Confidence pulls you forward. But humility lifts you upward.
What do you think?
Thanks for reading!
Damien